Fresh Ink: Combatting the Fear of Being Average Amidst College Application Season

When asked at the age of eight what my “dream career” was, I had quite a range of options: a professional bowler, a figure skating instructor, a mom, an illustrator, a Broadway actress—the list goes on. At that age, I pursued whatever captivated me at the moment. After watching a season of Cupcake Wars with my sister, I declared myself a baker and rushed to the kitchen to create my desserts, leaving a huge mess for my mother to clean up. After witnessing the 2012 presidential debates, I decided that I, too, would one day run for president, despite being an immigrant and naturalized citizen—the first Indian-born American president. After falling in love with the performing arts due to my upbringing surrounded by Bollywood films, I dreamed of becoming an actress.

Slowly, though, dance classes were replaced by tutoring sessions, and my free time, once designated for burning down the kitchen, was filled with SAT prep. Nine years later, proclaiming that my dream career is to be an illustrator might elicit a laugh at best. Over time, I, and many other children my age, have let go of our dreams to pursue ‘realistic’ options. The truth is, we only have 720 days of high school. In a school district like West Windsor-Plainsboro, where our alumni go on to some of the most prestigious colleges in the nation, students are pushed to “use their time wisely.” What “wisely” means, however, is debated. Realistically, yes, being a full-time illustrator probably wouldn’t pay well or withstand the current economy. However, if art makes me happy, why would I want less of it in my life?

I started thinking about what I wanted to do for the rest of my life in eighth grade. Before I learned calculus, understood inflation, or could distinguish between a Democrat and a Republican, I was trying to decide the outcome of my future. Today, as a rising high school senior, college applications seem to be the only thing on my mind. College application culture demands that students define themselves through one passion, whether that be art, politics, computer science, or football. Many argue the opposite, that colleges look for “well-rounded” students, but this is false. Colleges look for “well-crafted” students—those who meticulously present themselves as exploring various passions while achieving perfection in all of them. For example, if you’re a computer science major with a secret love for art, that passion means nothing unless you have national accreditation for your work. What happened to being average? I love baking and cooking for my family. I’m god-awful—genuinely, anything I touch will probably burn. But I love it regardless. There isn’t enough time for children my age to make mistakes, and to be average.

The fear of becoming “average” looms over nearly everyone. We don’t want to be forgotten; we want to have an impact and be “different.” This isn’t to say I’m exempt from this worry—I, too, dream of becoming an international war correspondent and winning a Pulitzer. The thought of working a typical 9-5 job scares me. But no matter how much we plan our lives, life will always be unexpected.

I try not to let the fear of failure or being “average” restrain me from opportunities. In many ways, we’re already average, and we will inevitably be average in multiple ways going forward. However, letting this fear hold you back from pursuing new things will confine you to a single-dimensional existence. Just as we’re already average, we’re also already different. Dream big, and don’t be afraid of failure. It’s okay not to be perfect at everything; once you get comfortable with that thought, life becomes much more enjoyable.

In a school district where perfection for college is strongly emphasized, I fear that high schoolers like myself are losing their creativity and ambition to try new things. The pressure to excel academically, pursue numerous extracurriculars, and craft the perfect college application leaves little room for genuine exploration. We’re often told to pursue what admissions counselors “want” to see, not what we want to do.

It’s unrealistic to expect any teenager to declare a lifelong passion before they’ve even learned to parallel park. Exploring various fields, even if you don’t have a natural talent or expect to pursue them in the future, is how one becomes a multi-dimensional person. It’s okay not to have your “story” figured out, even if you need to tell one to get into college.

More importantly, as a high schooler transitioning from childhood to the real world, it’s critical to maintain passions that you pursue just for fun. Download Duolingo and learn a new language—not because it’s an addition to your resume but because you can. Go for a run, record a 10-minute mile, laugh to yourself, and give yourself a pat on the back because you actually did it! If you’re like me, try baking blueberry muffins and pretend to be surprised when they turn out looking more like brownies. It won’t be long before we’re all forty and complaining to our kids about how we withered our teen years away by stressing over that B in Precalculus.

Of course, these activities do require time, so where will you find it? The truth is, you won’t. You have to deliberately make time to explore random hobbies. Instead of using downtime between studying and your next extracurricular to compare yourself to others on social media, try something new. Trying, and more importantly, failing, is a pivotal step in finding one’s identity at a time when you’re expected to know it already.